IC Contact Post

[theshortestbird]

"Hey, you've reached Tim. I can't pick up right now, but leave a message and I'll get back to you when I can."

Comments

[mediumdrip]

No, I think you summed it up pretty well.

I thought that I calmed him down at the end, but then we were texting and all I did was upset him again.

In the end, I suggested we go to couples therapy.

[theshortestbird]

Wow. [Tim took a sip of his coffee, making a face and adding a little bit of creamer.]

Okay. Wow. [He smiled a little, biting the inside of his cheek and frowning.]

Right. Sure, okay, couple's therapy works. That's not really a bad thing, especially if you're both already going to see therapists of your own. Why is he upset, though?

[mediumdrip]

He wants to pick up where we left off instead of starting over. He wants me to move back in with him.

[And the fact that he can't, that just the idea fills him with dread and terror, makes Blaine feel so pathetic and useless.]

[theshortestbird]

[Tim raises an eyebrow at that, pushing off of the counter and gesturing for Blaine to follow him to the couch. He doesn't want to do too much on his feet, especially now that he needs that kind of energy for other things.]

He needs to stop pressuring you to do that. You need time and space to get back to a place that makes you feel good, and he's really not helping you by being selfish. If he loves you, he should understand.

[mediumdrip]

Is he? This is a relationship. I need to make sure his needs are being met too. This can't just always be about me and what I need. I feel like that's how our relationship has been. My mistakes. My emotions. My needs.

That's not fair to him.

[theshortestbird]

You're right. You need to make sure his needs are being met, too, but not at the expense of your well being. You both need to find new boundaries with each other. Things won't just go to how they used to be, that wouldn't be fair to either of you.

[He chewed on the inside of his cheek for a second.]

I don't think you're wrong in saying no to moving back in together, though. You're both kids. I don't mean that in a bad way! I'm a kid, too. We have our moments of being responsible, but when you come home from work, you shouldn't have to worry just yet about being the perfect boyfriend. You should just be able to relax.

[mediumdrip]

I keep telling him that too. I just want to be able to be a teenager again.

I don't think he agrees though. I think he wants me to admit that I've changed too much to be who I was.

I just... I think counseling is going to help. That's all. I just wanted to talk to someone, to get all of this out.

[theshortestbird]

Maybe you can't be who you were, again, but you can be yourself, but a little better. You have changed. You changed from how you were a few months ago, but that doesn't mean jumping back into a relationship is going to make things better. That's just common sense.

[Nods.] I think counseling is a good idea, now that I've slowly accepted the idea. [Smiles faintly.] I think it'll help.

[mediumdrip]

I hope so.


I think we need to communicate in ways that don't just end up hurting each other.

[theshortestbird]

That's a good start. I know Kurt's not exactly the kind of guy you can have a fight against and get some aggression out in a mock battle, but... I think therapy will help. You have to hurt to heal, right?

[He gives a little nod.] Even if it hurts a lot.

[mediumdrip]

[Blaine nods and then after a moment moves so that he can lean against Tim.]

Thank you.

[theshortestbird]

No problem. [He smiled, reaching out and patting his head. He can't really ruffle his hair, could he?]

I'm here anytime.

[mediumdrip]

[Blaine smiles and looks up at him]

Did you talk to Connor?

[theshortestbird]

A little bit. Not... a lot. It's been a little awkward, honestly. We're a little nervous around each other, since it's pretty much a giant elephant in the room.

[He shrugs and looks away.]

[mediumdrip]

Do you think you really feel that way about him?

[theshortestbird]

[He chews on the inside of his cheek.] You know how sometimes you have crushes on people, and they don't always make sense? But you admire them, and you look up to them, and you just...

[He shrugs.] He was my first real friend. Someone who liked being around me, even if he didn't know who I was.

[mediumdrip]

[Blaine does know so he nods in a way that acknowledges it.]

So, you'll always love him. I can get that. You know, it's possible it was just a heat of the moment thing. You were fighting and emotional. You might even have been terrified of losing him again. It's natural to want to do something drastic.

You don't have to make sense of it all right now.

[theshortestbird]

I don't usually do drastic. [He really doesn't. Drastic is for people who haven't had a gun to their face or a knife to their throat. "Observe in order to preserve". He'd learned that one well.]

I'm worried about ruining our friendship, still. [He shrugs.] My list of people I've kissed is pretty short, too. Don't tell anyone that, though.

[mediumdrip]

Mine is pretty short too. [Blaine admits after a moment.] It pretty much only includes Kurt and Rachel. [which is an embarrassing memory]

I don't think this will ruin your friendship, if what I know about both of you is accurate.

[theshortestbird]

You kissed Rachel? [That was a surprise, actually. Such a random one in the relatively short list.]

...What do you know about both of us? [He's really curious.]

[mediumdrip]

I was drunk. We made out. In front of everyone. [Blaine says, hoping that will explain.]

I know that you're loyal to him, that you always talk about him. I know that you're both good men. That you've fought side by side against the type of people that kids like me can't even imagine. I think all of that means that you're loyal and have a bond that is beyond friendship.

But you can tell me if I'm wrong.

[theshortestbird]

[Yup. That explained it all.

But Blaine hit it right on the money. Did he really talk about him all the time? Right after he'd died, he'd only talked around him. That vacation that wasn't really a vacation; he didn't speak about him. But being in this city made him realize how much he really missed him. Blaine was right. They did have a bond. The tips of his ears turned pink as he looked down with a smile.]

You're not wrong.

[mediumdrip]

Well, I'm glad that you would compare me to someone you really care about.

[theshortestbird]

You guys do have some similarities. [His blush deepened. He had always been foiled by romance; he tried to make it work, before. Tried to be normal, tried to be someone who didn't go on a date and ditch in the middle to fight crime. Someone who didn't fall asleep on a roller coaster.

He did try.]

Sorry. So, um... changing topics? Sports, weather, gossip?

[mediumdrip]

[Blaine chuckles a bit] We can talk about how awesome ice cream is?